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Thoughtful Thursday

 Have you ever considered the way your children view your commitment to your community? I do now more than ever. Let’s be honest, kids can be very egocentric developmentally. This isn’t a product of poor parenting or being spoiled. It’s life. 
I’m feeling a bigger sense of responsibility the more involved I become in community service projects. I’m not sure if it’s coming from volunteering just being in my life all of the time or my true self awareness to the world around me. Would the feeling go away if I stopped leading projects to better our community? The truth is that I don’t know. 

A Letter to Myself: July Sucks

I know July will be a mixture of feelings you don’t quite understand. You may feel like you should be prepared. After all, you have 11 months to prepare and it’s been happening for the last 6 years. 

When his dad arrives to pick him up, you’ll be engulfed with a feeling of panic. That lump in your throat and pit in your stomach you seldom feel, it’ll be larger than life. 

You will feel sad. Hurt. Maybe angry at times. You’ll walk around his room just looking for tiny messes to pick up. The granola bar wrapper you find under his bed won’t upset you this time. You’ll wish he were around to exclaim, “Don’t pull the cats tail!” or “Go back and actually brush your teeth this time.”

You’ll have all the time in the world to sleep. That’s something you often dream of! Yet, it’ll be a struggle to shut your mind off because you’re wondering if he’s okay. Is he safe? Is he feeling loved? Where is he? Does he need you? Does he miss you? Save yourself the sleepless nights and know he loves you, he misses you, he’s having fun yet he needs you. Forever.

You may feel a little more free than usual. It will be fleeting, but you are allowed to feel that way. Don’t feel guilty. Isn’t it you that has always described being a parent as, “The hardest job you will ever love.” This also sounds familiar, “You never know what it means to say you’d literally die for someone until you’re a parent.” You deserve the break. After all, there’s only one of you and he is coming back. 

You know there are pros to this time of the year. He gets to spend uninterrupted time with his dad and your son deserves that. All children deserve to feel that their daddy sports a red cape just like their favorite superhero. You’ve done all you can to preserve that image for as long as he will believe it. You will have hit that reset button you reference. You’ll be the best version of yourself when you see him again and you both deserve that. 

Enjoy July. It’s not sad. It’s a time for both of you to renew the love of your everyday simple life together. 

The Accidental Blogger

I never thought I’d be asked to be on a panel of bloggers. Life has been quite interesting lately. Quite honestly… life is exciting! 

When I was asked to be part of the panel I thought, “Wow! They must be pretty desperate.” The more I thought about it the more it actually made sense. I believe I fall into the category of the “accidental blogger.”

My reason for blogging started solely for the purpose of healing myself. I knew that in order to heal I had to face some very personal and painful realities head on. What better way to be accountable than to make it available for the world to read?

My experience as part of the panel was all positive. I was by far the most amateur blogger. This meant I was able to learn a lot from my fellow panelists. It was interesting to hear their process of making their thoughts come to life. I quickly realized my initial reason for beginning my blog was different than theirs. I was able to identify areas of strengths and weaknesses. While my intentions for sharing my experiences are pure and simple, I have room for improvement if I hope to reach more people. Truth be told I figured out how to properly hashtag about 6 months ago. I often publish posts that aren’t categorized meaning I haven’t attached a hashtag and no one will ever find my post. I also realized the value of releasing posts on a consistent basis. Having readers who can rely on getting the goods on a particular day can foster their loyalty to you. 

I’m glad I was involved in the panel. Most importantly, I’m thankful I was able to learn from others on how to be a better blogger. I respect the opinions of the other bloggers. We all have reasons for what we do and things that matter to us. I did have a different opinion than a panelists and I wish we had time to explore that. We were asked what tips we had for those just beginning to blog. A panelist explained that she felt you should know yourself, your brand, and what you stand for before beginning your blog. My experience has been the exact opposite. I feel like the niche that I’ve found myself in is owning the fact that I have nothing figured out and that life has low points and we’ve all been there. I’m being vulnerable by letting the world know that I’m figuring out this next phase of my life one moment at a time. 

The event was well organized, lighthearted, yet informative. It was great seeing the different motivators and stages in the process. It was a great night with great people!